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Wednesday, June 22, 2005

What Can You Learn from Your Favorite Celebrity?

Good morning, Live Better than a Billionaire-a-Holics!

Now that you are well on your way to meeting celebrities in delightful surroundings and discussing fascinating, unexpected topics, let's start to do advanced celebrity training.

When did I learn the most from meeting celebrities? When I simply observed them being themselves.

Here are a few examples to stimulate you.

One year at a Renaissance Weekend, I was having trouble walking so I would plop down in the first available seat to rest whenever possible. In the process, I often found myself joining a famous person who had the same problem. As we sat there, mutually chagrined by our lack of mobility, we would start to chat. Bright-eyed, bushy-tailed younger people would stop by and chat with the celebrity also . . . who would introduce me to them as well. I'll never forget the hour I spent with a world-famous conductor doing this. This gentleman had mentored virtually every musician who was at the event, and they all came by to express their love and admiration for the man. He was active with current projects for each person, and I got a wonderful sense of the gift you can give to future generations by sharing your attention and wisdom with those who are following in your footsteps.

Another year, I was a greeter for the newcomers. Our job was to help them meet others, show them the ropes and make them feel they knew at least one friendly person. My guests were having a marvelous time, and we often spoke during the conference. At the first big dinner, we all noticed a very famous singer . . . not wearing her name tag. Now, this is a conference where the president of the United States wore a name tag. People began to wonder what was with her. Then another famous person walked up to the singer and asked the singer who she was. When the singer gave her name, the other famous person said, "And what do you do, dearie?" It was a put on, but the singer never got the message. The singer was lost in a world of her own and didn't really see herself as others saw her. There was a good lesson in that. For the rest of the conference, people would start up conversations by recounting their reactions to this encounter.

Many celebrities are different when they are with their children, even when those are adult children. A few months later, my family and I were in Washington, D.C. for the second Clinton inauguration. We needed to get from one side of Pennsylvania Avenue to the other. Normally, that's no problem. But for the inauguration, the Secret Service had stopped letting people cross about four hours before anything was to happen. Suddenly, I spotted the teasing celebrity I mentioned in the last paragraph, accompanied by her son and they were discussing how they were going to cross as well. I said to my family, "Let's follow them. She'll find a way to get across if anyone can . . . and we can beg to follow when she does." Soon, the celebrity's son had engaged about 14 Secret Service agents to discuss the problem. The celebrity began telling stories, signing autographs and having a ball. Forty-five minutes passed and she was no closer to the other side than anyone else was. She just wanted to enjoy the moment, and she ignored her son in the process. I should mention that this same woman had come up to a younger, good-looking man who was not a relative on a crowded bus another time. When I got up to offer her my seat, she said, "That's okay. Let me sit on his lap. It's okay. I'm single." And she did sit on his lap. Her son blushed for the next 20 minutes, but she didn't seem to notice. This celebrity could have used a little behavioural modification in her life when she was with her children.

Celebrity children are interesting to watch, too. Some, like the son in the above stories, seem to have the patience of saints and are always delightful. Others put on a good act when Mom or Dad is around, but act like spoiled brats the rest of the time. The parents never seem to have a clue about the spoiled brat problem because it's so well hidden. The daughter of a former First Lady joined her mother for one Renaissance Weekend. The daughter and her mother were as natural as any mother and daughter you've ever met. In fact, when you spoke with either of them, it was very much like talking to long-time neighbors. They were just naturally friendly and interested in everyone. They also treated each other more like loving sisters than mother and daughter. It was a pleasure to observe or talk to them. Those lovely women have been role models for me ever since.

At autograph signings, I've also noticed two forms of behavior that are very common. Some celebrities will enjoy conversing with each fan while others will simply rehearse their smile for each person while a personal handler shoos people through the process as quickly as possible.

One of my most interesting celebrity watching experiences was when my son graduated from Princeton with his Ph.D. Oprah Winfrey was to receive an honorary doctorate that day. As part of the ceremony, she had to parade around the whole assembled group while thousands pressed forward to take pictures. Ms. Winfrey made considerable effort to look each well-wisher briefly in the eye and to brighten her smile slightly when she did . . . before relaxing the smile a bit . . . before repeating the process for another person. She wanted to be there for each person . . . and make the day even more special. It was very impressive to watch. I never gave another speech in the same way after seeing the effect of her caring attitude.

As you can see, the celebrity role tends to magnify how we see another person. From studying that magnification, we can each learn important lessons about how we should treat others and be ourselves.

Donald W. Mitchell, Your Dream Concierge

Copyright 2005 Donald W. Mitchell

Be sure to check out my blog dated May 30, 2005 on Plan Your Best Fourth of July! To find that blog, keep clicking on the oldest blog entry you can find in the right hand column until you find the title "Plan Your Best Fourth of July."